Am I good enough?
Of late I have been getting thoughts like, We live only once Am I doing enough? Am I even worthy?
It seemed to be a random thought in the beginning. But, it didn't stop there. When reminded, again and again, the mind creates a web of thoughts and instances around one constant question, Why Am I not good enough? I often tried to suppress this very thought either by watching inspirational movies or listening to motivational speakers. Although everything seems to be okay on the outside, deep down I knew it's not working.
Initially, I was under the impression that it's just me until a colleague of mine brought this up in one of our office calls. And surprisingly more than half the group could resonate with the same. That's when I realized it's not something to do with me. But there are many people likewise. Being in a constrained place, looking at people on social media posting something new every day, while you are doing the same things day in and day out, and not having to meet new people in this work-from-home culture has made many of us slide into this cocoon of negativity.
Often, thoughts are not the reality. They are just some food for the mind to munch upon. Just because one thinks they aren't good enough does not mean they aren't. It can be toxic when repeatedly you hear people telling you to be positive. Cos you aren't. Accepting the fact that I'm feeling negative today makes life so much easier. Moreover, we are humans and nobody is perfect. So, I thought it's important to make a blog out of this for myself to bring out my feelings and if doing so can benefit at least 1 more person the effort is worth it.
Here are a few things that I do on a daily basis to combat these thoughts,
1. Journaling all my negative thoughts. When done on a daily basis it helps in relieving baggage.
2. Meditation is a great tool to keep us grounded. Vipassana in my case makes me realize every day that it's just a matter of time and this too shall pass.
3. Sharing my feelings with like-minded people especially those who can resonate with me helps a lot.
4. Gratitude towards what I have today and counting my blessings is something I started recently and it does help at times.
5. Involving myself in things that I love doing without having any expectations be it gardening, cooking, or reading helps to ease my mind to a great extent.
Mind believes what we train it to believe. So instead of cursing the thoughts training them to be kind, will itself make us feel worthy and enough today.